The Quote That is Stuck in My Mind. Here's Why.

by Kathryn White

“If you change the way you look at things, the things you look at change.” 

— Wayne Dyer 

Change has been the most consistent part of my life with cancer.

Being diagnosed with stage 4 colon cancer has brought changes into my life that I could never have imagined possible. From changes in my daily life, to what I eat, to how I think about myself and how I live in this world, change has become a concept I have learned to accept. But, it wasn't always like this. I spent the best part of my pre-cancer life, all 42 years of them, uncomfortable and at times resistant to change.

Until I had no choice but to embrace it.

Maybe you are experiencing a lot of change in your life right now. Some of these changes may feel overwhelming, while others may feel necessary and you are embracing them. Wherever you are with change, what I can tell you is, it is a very personal process. Some people can implement changes quickly and just want to get them done. Others need time and reflection before they can implement changes. However you approach change what is known is that it is a time of action, and action is going to help you to move forward.

What changed for me

Year one of life with cancer was like a daily roller coaster of unknowns. For a person (aka me) who does not prefer change, it was a lot to see my daily routine, my habits, my beliefs, and my day to day life change so drastically and so quickly. I went from getting up at the same time everyday, eating the same breakfast, brushing my teeth at the same time, driving the same route to work, doing the same at work routines and then doing everything in reverse at the end of the day to no routine.

My brain was overwhelmed by having to adjust to that oh so icky phrase, "my new normal."

There is nothing about receiving a cancer diagnosis that is normal or that creates normal. Enter the Wayne Dyers quote of changing the way you look at things that creates change in your life.

Not having to go full tilt every day allowed me to take the much needed rest that my body clearly needed. I had to start seeing my life from a different perspective, the one of the person who now had different priorities. My priorities shifted from busy full time teacher to surviving and navigating day to day. This was the beginning of what I call post cancer me.

Year two brought more change. Having completed treatment and been told to go back to living my life, I was lost. I quit my job, which created an identity crisis. What does a no longer teacher with an exhausted and overwhelmed body and mind do? I had no choice but to change how I moved through my days and how I took care of myself. My job description changed from teacher to learner. I had to learn who I was now and how I was going to reclaim my life.

Years three and four were when I opened my mind to being a teacher but in a different way. When I saw that teaching didn't require me to be in a full time classroom position, I was able to open up new possibilities that created new ideas that opened up my world. I started to look at teaching differently and my mindset around teaching changed. I became a Culinary Nutrition Educator, teaching other women how to cook healthy meals and why eating health building foods is so important. I became a yoga teacher and taught other women the beauty of yoga for movement and mindfulness.

Years five and six allowed me to see the gift that I had received when I was diagnosed with cancer. The gift of life and hope and change. I leaned back into teaching by becoming an online course creator, offering programs to women to support their health. I kept adding new healing modalities and holistic practices to my own life seeing them as good, healthy changes. I was no longer afraid of change but instead was embracing it wholly and completely.

But somewhere in there a voice inside me told me that I wasn't done changing. That there was still more. I felt called to do more and give more.

That's when I discovered coaching. I hired my own coaches who walked me through deep internal changes in my mindset, my self beliefs, and my vision for myself. I fell in love with the idea of no longer teaching in the traditional way, of instead embracing a new style of teaching and at the same time, not being afraid of my cancer story. In the early years my story become the catalyst for personal growth and having to make changes. Now I was ready to take what I knew about teaching, what I had learned about surviving cancer, and the inner work that I was doing to share what I had learned with other women. 

I decided to become a Holistic Cancer Coach.

What I have learned about myself and change

By changing the way I look at things, the things I look at change.

Fear is an opportunity to explore what is in my heart.

A negative thought is an opportunity to question why I respond the way I do and to ask what is really driving that thought.

New situations can be exciting.

Mistakes are learning opportunities.

Cancer was the wake up call that I needed so that I could become a happier and healthier person.

By embracing change rather than resisting it, I have created a whole new version of myself. A new life that is still changing and evolving. And, I like it that way. I have learned that I was stuck in a rut because I didn't like change. Now, because I made the choice to make changes, I am free to try new things, explore new concepts, and not have a prescriptive life.

I have learned how to hear my internal struggles and acknowledge them for what they are, stories that I created over a lifetime that were fear based, trauma based, and unforgiving.

I have uncovered the real me that was hiding like a scared child, afraid of doing things wrong, not being good enough, and of disappointing others and myself. This version of me is stronger than I have ever been, more confident than ever, and more trusting of myself. This version of me is fearless and empowered. 

And, what I have discovered is that I really like her, this new me. She is a thriver.

There is a lot to navigate when you are living with cancer. When you have guidance and tools in your life you start to reclaim your life and choose to learn how to live with cancer. Cancer does not get to control your life, you do. 

To learn more about reclaiming your life and choosing to learn how to live with cancer join me in my free 7 Day Get Thriving Mini-Course. Sign up for my newsletters and get immediate access to the course. Explore this mini-course that shows you some of the key fundamentals to becoming a cancer thriver.

If you would like to know more about the concept of living with cancer, I have written a book all about my personal experience with moving from survivor to thriver. In my book I offer anecdotes and strategies that will encourage you to learn how to thrive with cancer. You can get a copy of Living to Thrive: a holistic guide to living with cancer here.

Kathryn White is a Certified Holistic Cancer Coach who supports women to turn their cancer diagnosis into a thriving story one woman at a time.